Sadness
Yesterday I was very sad.
The people who knows me knows that is take a lot for me to be sad. But yesterday I was in the brink of tears.
The Company is yet again, not paying their employees. This Friday it will be the fourth week that we don’t get paid. To add insult to injury, we were hand out checks last Friday, 3-week-old checks, but we were told not to cash them until we are told we can do it. Now we are all carrying useless pieces of paper that aren’t any better than I.O.U notes. The pattenr here is that if you don’t get paid on Fridays, then you are not getting paid that week. Promises of payment coming up the following Monday or Tuesday are never true. Conveniently the bosses do not show up on Friday and the account person becomes unavailable until is time to go home and nobody got a paycheck and we all know that there is not point in demanding an explanation.
Today I learned that this next payday doesn’t look any goo, add that to The Company’s lack of interest in helping me find a solution to my commute from hell problem. I am spending $450 + a month in commute, and the company is not paying me. I am already overdraft, the bills are piling up and there are not signs that this situation will improve anytime soon.
So, last night, I was sad. I felt defeated. I felt hopeless. I felt trapped because this crappy job is all I have now. I felt like an idiot for agreeing to this job in the first place. I just wanted to cry. I wanted to just not come back to work at all, what would be the point? Is not like they are paying me anyway.
This morning I traveled to work in autopilot. I wasn’t there. I let me body drive me to the office, and for better or worse, the trip was smooth and with no delays.
